I Don't Want to Talk About the Pandemic. Let’s Talk About Pregnancy Instead.

Covid 19. I’ve been reluctant to delve into it publicly in my business life. It’s not that I don’t think there’s important information that you should be aware of. It’s that I feel like it’s something I’ve needed to step back from. It has almost felt like there is too much information and that can present its own set of issues.

It’s easy to get caught up in daily briefings, new cases, data, shortages. Important information-absolutely. However, all the uncertainty, the isolation, the fear.... none of it is helpful. It’s easy to go down a rabbit hole of “what ifs.” It’s hard to be away from people that we love. Not having our routines can be tough. Thinking about the future when you have no clue what that future holds can be dizzying. I just haven’t wanted to add to that.

Yet here I am bringing it up. I can’t help but see some parallels between this pandemic and pregnancy and this is what I do want to address. Instead of adding to any potential negativity, I’m going to do something I enjoy doing as a doula and help you shift your focus.

There are many unknowns right now in the world just as there a lot of unknowns in pregnancy and parenthood. Educate yourself. Take the time to learn about options, policies, and options.

Put some preferences on paper, tell them to the folks who need to know them, and then put the “what ifs” out of your mind. You’ve prepared for it, you don’t need spend more energy focusing on it. Instead, focus on what you can control.

Many people are purging, refreshing, and catching up on things they haven’t had time to do. It’s as if everyone is nesting. What is it about this time that is making folks react this way? Expectation of change. Time. Needing to occupy their minds. Preparing for whatever is coming next. Take this opportunity to embrace a new pace of life.

You may find yourself with some time on your hands and reflecting on how things used to be before all of this. This may dredge up a myriad of emotions. It is important to acknowledge your feelings. They are valid and you are entitled to them. Be kind to yourself. Do you feel like all this is changing you as a person? This is a great time to take stock of what’s actually important and what you want going forward.

There has never been a better time to learn/acknowledge your needs and set new healthy boundaries. This is something I always talk about during fourth trimester prep sessions and it makes just as much sense to bring it up to you now. When you are thinking about what comes next, it’s important to take yourself into consideration. I need you to know that this is not selfish. What can you put in place to have your needs met? We often spend a lot of time considering others before or instead of ourselves. If we are to be happy and flourish, we need to know what it will take to get us to that point. This is true in work life and home life. It’s okay to hit a reset button from time to time.

Navigating a new normal is easier with support in place. Identify the people in your life that will show up for you. Surround yourself with people that will cheer you on and build you up. You will get through this. We are all going to get through this together. There are still options. There are still people to talk to and ways to connect. It’s okay to not know all the answers.  We are all learning as we go.

As always, if you’re having feelings that you are finding difficult to process, please find a safe person to talk to. We all may have to be apart right now, but you are not alone in this.