I woke up with a teenager in the house today. She’s not any different than she was yesterday other than she gets to say she’s no longer 12. It’s not a huge change in my eyes. I don’t have that “Oh my goodness I have a teenager!” feeling about her turning 13. She’s been taller than me for at least a year and hasn’t acted like a “kid” in a long time.
It does however make me miss my baby. I don’t miss the fact that she wouldn’t sleep in her crib for a year or all the dirty diapers. I miss the way she felt in my arms in those adorable snuggly baby outfits, watching her getting hours of enjoyment in a refrigerator box, and watching the look on her face when she heard her sister’s heartbeat for the first time-and later seeing “her” baby for the first time. I miss reading to her every night before bed and watching as she learned how to read to herself.
These days she only wants to snuggle with her cell phone and the only box she finds hours of enjoyment in is the television. The excitement of having a sister has long worn off. She was already an amazing creature, but she is growing into something more. She is smart, funny, independent, and devours books. She’s driven. She can also be mouthy and moody and often wants nothing to do with any of us. I love all of it and as much as I’d love to go back and visit those moments and miss my baby, I wouldn’t want to start over again. I love where we are.
Snuggle your babies while you can. They grow up to soon.
Cristina Evans is a Mother of 3, Wife, & Birth Doula